Sunday, 3 November 2013

A Shared First – Our first Rugby League match


Let me take you back, dear reader, to the early months of this year, when my husband and I had this conversation:

Husband: It's the Rugby League World Cup this year. There might be some matches nearby.
Me: That would be cool, but would we take Eleanor?
H: I don't know, it's in November.
Me: Oh, she'll be nearly two by then, she'll be much more grown up.
H: Yeah, I reckon she'd be able to go.
Me: Yeah, let's book some tickets.

Fast forward to two days ago, as I looked at my nearly-two-year-old daughter, who wasn't that much more grown up. If anything, the passage of months had just made her more active and wriggly, and less able to focus on anything for more than a minute. (Unless that something is 'Raa Raa the Noisy Lion'. Which, unfortunately, is very different to a rugby match.) I had realised by this point that I had been a bit naive in thinking she could sit through an 80-minute match. But the tickets were booked for the following day's match between England and Ireland. No going back.

It was very important to me that, at some point in her early life, Eleanor should go to a Rugby League match. Having been mostly uninterested in sport for the first 27 years of my life, I suddenly got interested in Rugby League when pregnant with Eleanor. Up until then, whenever my husband watched it, I would shake my head, mutter something about it being a violent, horrible sport, and go into another room. But, being very pregnant, I didn't have the energy to go into another room, so I ended up watching it. And loving it. And realising that it wasn't actually violent as such – yes, it's very physical, rough, sometimes aggressive, but not actively violent. Thinking about it, it's a very good example of how to channel the need to 'play rough' in a non-violent way, which is an important message for young people. So Rugby League and Eleanor seemed to be bound together by this revelation. But of course, I couldn't go to a match when I was heavily pregnant, and going with a baby seemed too difficult, so I was yet to go to a live match myself, and I was excited to share a first experience with my little girl.

I also wanted to take her to a match because I wanted her to know that she can be interested in whatever she wants. Sport is still often seen as a male interest, and RL is a pretty masculine sport, but the tide is changing and women are increasingly getting interested and involved in sport. I'd dabbled in sport as a girl, trying ineptly to play football at primary school, but it was mainly to prove a point, that girls could be sporty. Unfortunately, the fact that I can't run without gasping for air and am apparently unable to kick or dribble a ball with any level of control, I probably did more damage to the sisterhood than good. But anyone can watch sport, no matter how unfit and uncoordinated, no matter what gender. By taking Eleanor to a Rugby League match, I would be broadening her horizons beyond typically 'girly' interests and showing her that she can like, do, be anything.

All very lofty, of course. But we kind of overshot in our ambitions. Really, nearly two is a bit young to expect any child to sit through a match, let alone my very energetic daughter. We were also a bit silly to take her to see England v Ireland – it was a sell-out match, which meant a very crowded stadium (we booked three seats but somehow ended up with only two, it was that packed). We had to get there nearly two hours early to get parked, and even then the stadium car park was full. Also, going in November meant wind and rain, so we couldn't wander around in the time before kick off, we had to get Eleanor under cover as soon as possible, so she was restless before the match even started. Half an hour in, she was asking to go home, but we did eventually manage to get her interested enough to get to the end of the match.


Despite it not being the ideal first match, I think she enjoyed it. On the way from the car park to the stadium, she kept saying, "Rubby! 'Citing!" and pulling a very cheesy excited face. There were various things to engage her – she liked watching the mascot going round, and we joined in the chants to keep her amused. She even paid some attention to the action, shouting, "running," and, "passing," and, rather cutely, "oops," when someone got tackled. That evening she babbled happily about all the things she'd seen, and although when we asked her if it was exciting she said, "no," I think really she liked it. So I'm looking forward to taking her again. When she's a bit older. And the weather is a bit nicer. And it's a slightly quieter home fixture.

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